


Ray of Sunshine

by gemessential



Category: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon
Genre: Everyone Is Gay, F/F, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-04
Updated: 2015-07-04
Packaged: 2018-04-07 14:27:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4266663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gemessential/pseuds/gemessential
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Obviously Haruka is destined to wear short skirts in every universe, the pompoms just happened in this one. But I’m a Cheerleader! movie crackfic</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ray of Sunshine

**Author's Note:**

> If you haven’t seen this movie I don’t know how you’ve survived up until this point.  
> Trigger warning for: aversion therapy, homophobia, inexplicably mean Serenity because I needed a villain, sad Pluto  
> Belated response to the January movie prompt on Tumblr.

Haruka arrived home the day before the big cheer trip to an unusual scene. Her parents were sitting in their living room, stonefaced, with a strange woman who smiled and introduced herself as Setsuna. The woman was beautiful – Haruka couldn’t help but notice – and she was wearing a bright pink shirt that bore the slogan “STRAIGHT IS GREAT.”

“Did somebody die?” Haruka asked, sitting down and resting her pompoms on the floor. Her boyfriend, Brad, had followed her inside uninvited. She was annoyed with this, but she was often annoyed with Brad and assumed that’s how you were supposed to feel about boys. 

“No, sweetie –“ protested her mother, but her face said otherwise.

Setsuna jumped in, mercifully. “Your family is concerned about your behavior. I’m here to facilitate the discussion. They think you may have some…homosexual tendencies.”

“What? But I’m a cheerleader! I have a boyfriend! Brad, the cutest guy in school!” She gestured towards Brad for effect.

“You don’t even like kissing me,” said Brad, in the usual Brad fashion. Haruka glared at him.

“Maybe you’re just not a very good kisser,” Haruka growled.

Setsuna interjected again. “Haruka, denial is a normal and healthy stage at this point. I used to be a gay as well, you know. Now I’m an  _ex-gay_ ,” she smiled supportively, patting Haruka’s hand. Haruka blushed, and Setsuna’s maternal and strangely attractive smile widened.  
  
“I work for a place called True Directions. We help people like yourself understand their homosexual tendencies, and how to  _heal_  them.”

“When can she leave?!” her mother asked shrilly. Haruka sighed.

—

All too soon, Haruka found herself at the True Directions compound, a stately pink Victorian house run by an elegant silver-haired woman named Serenity.

“Alright, dear. Makoto will show you around,” Serenity said, then wandered off to prune the rosebushes. Makoto was a tall, auburn-haired girl who blushed profusely when she introduced herself. Haruka was willingly led over to a whiteboard, where the students’ progress was being documented.

“Step one was easy, you have to admit you’re a homosexual,” Makoto said, shyly.

Haruka nodded. “There must be some mistake, though. I’m a cheerleader.”

Makoto cocked her head, looking at Haruka appraisingly. “Ummm. Well, let me show you. I’m a homosexual,” she said, somewhat breathily, stepping closer to Haruka. “See how easy it is? I’m sure you’ll be there in no time.”

“Um, sure,” said Haruka.

Makoto showed Haruka the rest of the compound, which was all painted in a garish pink hue, until they had group meeting time. Introductions were made: Rei, Usagi, Minako, and Ami were all introduced and were, unsurprisingly, homosexuals.

“I’m Seiya, I like pain, and I’m a homosexual,” said a butch girl wearing a collar. Haruka was only somewhat paying attention; she couldn’t stop staring at the turquoise-haired girl who would be the last to introduce herself.

“I’m Michiru, and I like girls.  _A lot_ ,” she said winningly, as she smiled at Haruka, catching her off guard.

“Haruka, now you should introduce yourself,” Serenity prompted.

“I’m Haruka, but there’s been some mistake. I don’t belong here. I’m not like all of you,” she said woodenly, staring at the ground.

Minako snorted. “You’re literally the gayest person here, come on.”

“What?! What do you mean?”

“Repressed butch lesbian cheerleader? I mean, it’s kind of textbook,” said Ami, peering at her owlishly from over a textbook. Makoto nodded at Ami supportively.

“I told you to stop reading those textbooks, that’s definitely not helping you,” Setsuna interjected gently.

“Everyone has those thoughts, though, it’s totally normal.” Haruka added. 

Michiru was smiling at her. “What thoughts?”

“Well, like, I mean everyone experiments! Everyone kisses other girls sometimes,” said Haruka, remembering long nights spent making out with the cheer captain, Elsa.

“Straight girls don’t kiss girls,” Usagi said glumly, her eyes watering up. Rei patted her arm sympathetically, then removed it when she saw Serenity’s frown. As if reciting by memory, she added, “They also don’t follow a girl around. Even if she’s the prettiest girl in the whole world,” before her voice got too shaky to continue.

“Kissing girls isn’t normal?” Haruka asked, wonderingly. Michiru laughed then tried to turn it into a cough.

“Kissing girls means you’re a  _lesbian_ ,” Minako clarified.

“Oh my god, it’s true. I’m a homo,” said Haruka. Setsuna and Serenity smiled triumphantly as all the other girls crowded around Haruka, hugging her for her realization. The process had begun!  
  
— 

Haruka was very proud when her “Step 1” was checked on the board. She was shown her small bed, which was right next to Michiru’s. Makoto was glued to Haruka’s arm, insisting on showing her everything around the compound.

“Here are the bunks. There’s no smoking in here. And nothing  _inappropriate_ ,” she added, in a hushed whisper.

“Inappropriate? Like cursing?” Haruka asked.

“Inappropriate like fucking,” interjected Minako. “You get caught in the throes of sodomy, it’s _au revoir_!” Michiru was watching her from the bed, and smiled when Haruka began to blush furiously.

“Don’t mind Minako, that’s just her way,” said Makoto.

They all climbed into their respective beds. The only noise was the repeated electrical buzzing from Seiya’s shock aversion therapy. “You think of a girl you like, and then you get a shock. That way you’re trained, like a dog,” Seiya had said glumly. Haruka was sorry she had asked. It made her feel sick to think about it.

 —

A few days into the training, and Haruka was doing well. She was relatively good at the feminine aspects of the trainings – applying makeup, painting nails, wearing restrictive clothing – from her time as a cheerleader, and she didn’t particularly mind it. The only thing she found challenging was thinking of men as attractive.

The group process discussions had also been challenging for her. Haruka had decided her “root,” the reason that she was gay, was because her mom had fed her too much jello. Serenity had been confused by this, and said that many people ate jello, heterosexual and homosexual alike. Haruka was struggling to think of a deeper root for her homosexuality, and she told Michiru so as they sat on the hill together, overlooking the small garden.

“You’re so good at being straight,” said Haruka glumly. Michiru had excelled in the “heterosexual attraction” portion of the training, cosying up to Mamoru at Serenity’s encouragement.

“Not particularly,” replied Michiru, pulling apart a clover flower in her hands. “You are who you are, the only trick is not getting caught.”

“Setsuna says that women have roles. After you learn that, you’ll stop objectifying them,” Haruka parroted.

“Well, have you? Stopped objectifying them?” Michiru grinned at her. Haruka couldn’t help smiling back. Although she didn’t want to admit it, she felt that she was hopelessly in love with Michiru already. Admittedly she could not stop thinking about Michiru in a variety of ways that probably should be shocked straight out of her. Maybe she could borrow Seiya’s electrowand – but then again, who knows where it had been.

Michiru got up, and Haruka couldn’t help reaching out to hold her hand, to pull her back down. Michiru evaded her gracefully.

“Careful, dear, I could report you for that,” she said. Haruka sighed.

–

Towards the end of the training, Haruka had realized that every single one of the girls were sleeping together, or at the very least kissing chastely and blushing madly when they saw each other, in Makoto and Ami’s case. Seiya and Usagi, a couple that Haruka found maddening for reasons she couldn’t parse out, were insanely passionate and prone to kissing whenever Serenity and Setsuna were not in sight. This made being assigned to a small group with them hugely irritating, in Haruka’s estimation. They were supposed to scrub the floor in a demurely feminine fashion together, and so far only Haruka held a scrubbing brush.

They were also a famously moody couple, Usagi especially. Haruka could tell from the general tone of the conversation that the shit was about to hit the fan, and yearned for the ability to leave the room.

“Why do you keep hanging out with me? You must be a masochist,” Usagi said, close to tears. Haruka had, by then, learned that Usagi was often close to tears. Although Haruka wanted to protect the girl, there was no getting between her and Seiya. Haruka scrubbed the floor furiously and wished she were deaf.

“Yeah, I am! You have no idea,” said Seiya angrily.

“Don’t talk to me like that!” Usagi yelled, dissolving into tears as she ran out of the room. Seiya sighed, then followed after her. Haruka glared at her back and restrained from punching her – only because punching another girl over their selfish love tryst probably wasn’t very straight, and she really was trying at this whole thing.

— 

That night, Michiru woke her up with a kiss on the cheek. The light through the window was silvery, and the shadows were long. “Shhh,” said Michiru quietly, pulling her up from bed. Haruka was more than willing to be led down the chilly hall, to the main office where Serenity told people they were inexcusably gay, or listened in when they called their parents on the rotary phone. 

Michiru quietly closed the door and turned around, the curve of her smile barely visible in the moonlight. She pressed her lips to Haruka’s, and Haruka couldn’t help but let out a strangled moan. This was not like kissing Brad, or like kissing Elsa. This was mind-numbingly different, and Michiru’s lips were so soft and fucking pliant and she was everything Haruka had ever wanted.

They spent several hours exploring each other, Haruka with wonder and Michiru with self-assurance that Haruka found shocking. They laughed with each other when Haruka’s stomach cramped, when Haruka accidentally clacked her teeth against Michiru’s, and when things got too serious. Haruka had just come again and hadn’t meant to but let out a small groan when the door opened and Serenity saw them. Michiru’s eyes widened, and she hastily wiped her wet fingers on her pants. 

“You little homos!” Serenity shrieked in rage, and doused them in a pitcher of water she had apparently procured just for this purpose. Setsuna was behind her, sleep rumpled, and lowered her eyes as the sputtering girls put on their pajamas. 

Later, they were brought back into the office. Setsuna was in the armchair by the desk, her face in her palms. Serenity was at the desk, her fingers intertwined as she regarded them with narrowed eyes.

“Whoever started this is out of the program,” she said, simply, waiting for them to betray each other.

There was a beat as Haruka and Michiru looked at each other, Haruka shocked, Michiru resigned. Then, before Haruka could open her mouth, Michiru said, “It was me. I started it. It’s my fault.”

Serenity rounded on her. Her smile was somehow cruel, and Haruka was shocked to see it on such a beautiful face. “Your family will be so disappointed in you. Your mother particularly.”   
  
“No! It was me. I did it,” said Haruka.

“You’ve done enough, you little dyke,” said Serenity. “You’ll be in the doghouse for the next week.“ 

“Just shut up, Haruka,” said Michiru, tiredly. As she left the room, she leaned down and squeezed her arm, then whispered in her ear, “You can do this. Go on.”

Setsuna led Haruka to the doghouse, with Serenity behind them cajoling her with epithets. The last thing she saw was Setsuna’s sad eyes as she shut the door. After that, it was just Haruka, the silence, the muddy grass, and the wooden walls that were her new prison.

–

Haruka woke, and she slept. There wasn’t much else to do. Once a day, Setsuna came and talked to her briefly, gave her some gruel and water, and let her use the bathroom, under strict supervision. She got the impression that the woman didn’t want her confined, but her love for Serenity meant she had to be the bad guy. Seiya came by and said she heard what happened. She even offered Haruka her electro wand, but Haruka refused. There was no way she could ever shock away the memory of Michiru. Seiya said she understood, and Haruka believed her.

There were harsh penalties if Serenity saw anyone by the doghouse, so her days were mostly solitary. She stared at the sunlight or the moonlight through the slats of the roof, and imagined her days were spent with Michiru. Cleaning the house, getting the mail, walking a ridiculous dog that they would adopt together, feeling the creases of Michiru’s smile.

She was so lost in thought one night she barely noticed the door creak open. “Haruka, dear? Come out of your pigpen.”

She couldn’t even believe it. There was Michiru, resplendent, the beams of the moon illuminating her hair in a halo. 

Choking back tears, she said, “It’s not a pigpen, it’s a dog house.”

“Well, hurry then. Unless you want to stay?” Michiru cocked her head.

 “No,” said Haruka, definitively. Michiru smiled and grabbed her hand. They walked through the garden, past the fence, to where Michiru had concealed a small and expensive-looking car in some bushes. There was a bouquet of roses in the back, and a cupcake in the front seat with her name on it in icing. 

She started crying, sitting in the front seat and eating her cupcake. “Where did you get all the money for this?”

“Well, I stole my parents’ credit card. And I’ve been embezzling from the Kaioh estate for years. I have a small fortune set away.”

Haruka cried in happiness as they drove away into the sunrise.

 —

Michiru got them a small apartment about three miles away from the True Directions compound. They completed their educations and both found relatively lucrative and fulfilling jobs. In their spare time, they abducted people from Serenity’s program and brought them to a local gay bar, or just fed them slow-cooker chili and told them about LGBTQ culture.

Setsuna was one of their first rescue missions. She spent three days weeping in their spare bedroom about Serenity’s internalized homophobia, and her unrequited love for the silver-haired woman. Haruka passed the time awkwardly patting the woman’s back and saying “It’ll be okay, buck up. You’re better off anyway.” She eventually recovered, and got an entry-level job as a life insurance agent.

In ten years, Haruka and Michiru got married. True Directions tried to picket their wedding, but at that point Serenity’s ranks had weakened, and the popularity of conversion therapy had lessened. She only had one participant, a sullen looking black-haired girl with unusual purple eyes, holding a sign that said “GO HOME DYKES.” Haruka and Michiru invited her to live in their spare bedroom and join the party, and Serenity gaped, open-mouthed, as Hotaru threw the sign down and joined the wedding party. She wasn’t the first person that they saved, or the last.


End file.
